Archive for April, 2013

There’s a pun to be made about the wheels of justice grinding slow and the first gear of an NV4500 transmission being geared quite low, but I can’t come up with it it.

Posted in Uncategorized on April 25th, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on There’s a pun to be made about the wheels of justice grinding slow and the first gear of an NV4500 transmission being geared quite low, but I can’t come up with it it.

Top theorists recognize that gender is much less a two-speed transaxle than an infinitely variable CVT like found in many gas/electric vehicles. While a locking differential has advantages in certain circumstances, there’s a reason that most go with at least a limited slip, if not an entirely open differential. We should all experiment with a double clutch at least once.

Also, be sure to come to a full stop when approaching an intersectionality.

Very Important Tractor Decisions!

Posted in Uncategorized on April 19th, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on Very Important Tractor Decisions!

Should I buy a John Deere and paint it orange or should I buy a Kubota and paint it green?

Lockblades

Posted in Uncategorized on April 14th, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on Lockblades

When I was young, my mother taught me to whittle. It was years before I realized one could make anything other than slightly narrower sticks.

Also, the memory of that red swiss army knife folding shut on my knuckles haunts me to this day. Hence the reason I carry at least two pocket knives with locking blades at all times.

Ronunism

Posted in Uncategorized on April 2nd, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on Ronunism

So I’m watching too much Parks and Rec. I like to fancy myself a Ron Swanson. A communist Ron Swanson. A Communron Swanson.

Communism.

Seriously, I have a literal hammer and sickle over here.

What is best in life?

Posted in Uncategorized on April 2nd, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on What is best in life?

To own two angle grinders. To see metal shavings driven before you and to hear the lamentations of your flap wheel.

Ornithology

Posted in Uncategorized on April 2nd, 2013 by Carnivorous Kale – Comments Off on Ornithology

I once traumatized a general contractor by showing him a picture of a duck penis I have on my phone (long story). Weeks later he was still sharing his amazement with his very Irish co-worker who took the time to inform me in his customary thick brogue that, “He won’t fookin’ shet up about that duck’s fookstick!”